Life without Serrapeptase/Nattokinase

I must admit, part of the reason why I don't update more often is because I've gotten a lot of page views, but very few comments, which makes me wonder if this is helping anyone at all. But maybe some people prefer to read and not comment. If so, this is for you guys!

March 15th was the day I stopped taking Serrapeptase regularly, since then I've barely taken it at all. It was making me feel like my ulcers were still bleeding, so it definitely had to be dropped from my routine. However, my body still feels good, and I still do take my Liquid Chlorophyll every morning, sometimes in the evening. I also continue to stretch every morning which has greatly helped my body. In the past, the muscle in my right leg between my pelvic bone and thigh was very weak and would sometimes cause me to limp. The muscle would sometimes get so stressed throughout the day that it would get to a point where it felt like it twisted, and then I wouldn't be able to walk for about a week. This, of course, was at times the bane of my existence. Stretching helped change all that. Since I started stretching, I noticed the muscle wouldn't hurt as much when I would walk, and over time it's become more limber and flexible, and it now feels like it works with me, as opposed to against me. All in all, stretching has helped my existence become easier! And it's such a simple thing to do, my basic routine can be done in about 5 minutes, though I'm sure sometimes I take longer with it by taking deeper breaths and just getting oxygen into my lungs. Trust me, it's a relaxing way to help start your day! Experiment with stretches and see what works for you :)

As usual, I have to put a reminder here about eating a diet high in Thiocyanate. It's simple to do once you get the hang of it, I promise! For instance, last night's dinner was beets, lentils, and roasted chicken. It was healthy and delicious! This morning's breakfast was Golden Grahams and warm milk. Variety in the diet is essential so you don't get bored and hop off the wagon like I did when I first started my new way of eating. A good suggestion for adding Thiocyanate filled foods to the diet would be to add a little bit at a time. For example, experiment with different recipes and find what works for you. Over the summer, I would make smoothies out of frozen strawberries and coconut milk ( with a bit of brown sugar and vanilla essence for extra flavor!) The smoothies were delicious, filling, and high in Thiocyanate! There are tons of things you can try, such as fried, baked, or boiled plantains, baked sweet potatoes, stewed lentils, steamed broccoli, raw carrots, bananas, and almonds just to name a few! Try them out consistently and get your Thiocyanate in large  amounts as well as your other vitamins from foods that are as close to their natural state as possible. Try these out and let me know what works for you!

Pain Pills: The Debate

I often debate with myself quite a bit before taking a pill for my aches and pains, knowing that with each pill I take, my resistance to its effectiveness is being increased. Here in France, I'm starting to feel a bit self-conscious about buying my painkillers. It's not like back home where I can walk into a large Walgreens and pick up a bottle of 100 Tylenol/Acetaminophen and pay for it with little interaction with the cashier. I have to ask a pharmacist for my Doliprane, and one night, when I was having crisis pain in my arm (I mentioned this a few posts back, it was more mild than an actual crisis because of my diet), the pharmacist asked me if I had a lot of pain, and I said yes, in my arm. Her words, "Vous-avez des douleurs importants?" still stick with me. Should I have explained to her that I have SCA? Not that I was really in the mood to explain anything as I was feeling pretty down. 

Based on the food list that I put up in my last post, I made a handy little health chart today. When I am able to scan it, I will add it as an image here. For now, visualize with me a bit. The chart starts with a list of (Thiocyanate) Rich Foods to Eat Daily or Multiple Times per Week - I added eggs to my list since they are packed with vitamins and I eat them almost everyday, so that is why I put Thiocyanate in parentheses. After that I have a list of my Daily Supplements, which are listed on the side of my blog, and hopefully next week will include Nattokinase, as I am preparing to order it from Amazon. I also have a space to note down if I took painkillers, if I stretched, and am using the back to write down any notes I have about the day. Today, for instance, I noted that I had pain in my right thigh (it's been there all day on and off and I have finally given in and taken a pill for it). On the chart, there is a slot for me to write the date for each day that I jot down information. I made 5 copies of it and am looking forward to being able to see more solid information about what works for me and what does not and how it makes me feel. The charts, combined with my blog, should be a good way to continue on my journey to health. :)

The Mighty, Mighty Egg

Yesterday and today I was feeling weakness in my bones, and I haven't eaten eggs in about a week. Given those two facts, I made a correlation and think that maybe the weakness in my legs is due to the fact that I haven't been eating eggs, which are packed with natural nutrients that are great for the body. Two things that eggs have that are wonderful are naturally occurring Vitamin D and B12, and Vitamin D is important in helping the body use Calcium to build healthy bones. I take a 5,000 i.u. Vitamin D3 supplement every other day (as recommended on the bottle), but it is important to get any type of vitamin or mineral in its most natural form rather than as a supplement. There is more information about the benefits of the mighty, mighty egg here. From now on I will go back to eating eggs daily as part of my nutritious breakfast. I've always found that they are a great way to start the day, but was worried that I wasn't getting enough thiocyanate in my diet and was replacing eggs with thiocyanate heavy foods for breakfast. But given that eggs are full of so many nutrients, I think it will be safe to keep eating them and reaping their many benefits. I will just make sure I get my thiocyanate at other times during the day. 

Update!

Hello all, I am finally back for my update! My diet has been treating me well, and I am feeling good, though tired since I've been working six days a week and getting up fairly early everyday, 6:30-7:30 am. My arms were a bit sore/hurting from having to pick up the baby I sit for as well as carrying grocery bags, so I started taking a double dose of Serrapeptase everyday. Which brings it up to 240,000 i.u. a day. Research I did about Serrapeptase says that it eats up scar tissue, but I haven't noticed great differences in my body. What I have noticed is that my stomach is a bit flatter, and the night I decided to double my dose, because I had mild aches and pains in my legs and arms, I noticed the next day that the pains were gone. I do have stomach ulcers, as I mentioned before, so I suspect that the Serrapeptase is working on healing those before it can go on to work on the rest of my body. In any case, there is no harm/downside to taking it, so doubling the dose has not given me any negative side effects, and Serrapeptase is also a natural painkiller, so I will keep up with the double dose. I have also been eating more fruits, as promised. Apples confuse my stomach/hunger signals, so I've taken to eating unsweetened apple/pear sauce, pears, and oranges, along with my trusted bananas (which also lower blood pressure and increase serotonin!). Other than that, I have no complaints, which is great! I hope this blog is helpful to people and that people will find inspiration to how to deal with their Sickle Cell. It is possible to live healthy and with little to no pain! This is my story and it's real! Back when I was in college and high school I had a lot more pain and took a lot of painkillers to deal with it, but now my body has the chance to heal from that damage and be healthier. As with all things, a diet change like this is a lifestyle change, and sticking to it and being patient is the key. For anyone who is ready to try it, I wish you success, and please, if you have any questions or comments, do not hesitate to get in touch with me, even if it's just to talk! I am here for whoever needs :)

My Daily Routine

So for anyone who is curious, here is what my daily routine includes, in addition to eating foods that are high in Thiocyanate. In the morning, I have my tablespoon of Liquid Chlorophyll in a cup of water after I eat my breakfast. I also take about 1200 mg Folic Acid, and a D-3 vitamin that is 5,000 iu. I drink plenty of water throughout the day, and if I don't drink enough while I'm out and about, I usually make up for it when I come home so that there is plenty of fluid in my system. In the evening, usually a few hours before I sleep, I take a Serrapeptase pill, and another glass of water with a tablespoon of Liquid Chlorophyll. I only added the extra tablespoon of Liquid Chlorophyll last week because I was feeling a bit poorly, and it has done me well. (I've had a bit of trouble sleeping since last week, and I'm wondering now if it isn't related to that extra tablespoon of chlorophyll. However, I feel great when I wake up in the morning, and the fatigue is nothing like the Sickle Cell fatigue I suffered in high school and sometimes in college.) 

Besides that, I try to make sure I have time to relax and wind down when I get home. I usually have plenty of time for that. It's important to rest and have time for oneself, and though my week is usually full of either work activity or going out to some place or another, I always take the time to rest by giving myself a day off or a quiet evening. There is also the fact that this work life is much easier than the student life I've been living. In high school and college I had demanding work loads and I find it much easier to just be able to go to work and come home and know that I am done for the day. There it is, in a nutshell, that's basically what I do everyday, and of course I take painkillers when necessary, but I take so many fewer painkillers than I did in the past, and that makes me feel great!

Adding More Fruits to My Diet

As promised, I have added more fruits to my diet! On Monday I went and purchased 4 apples and 4 oranges. My body doesn't seem to respond well to when I eat apples, it seems to confuse my stomach so that I don't know how hungry I am afterwards or how full. I've decided that I'll purchase apple sauce instead of buying apples because of how my body reacts to them. The apple sauce I buy has no added sugar, so I don't need to worry about that. Sugar causes inflammation in the body, so I try not to consume more of it than necessary. The oranges I purchased are a type called Clemenvilla and they are really delicious! I have a whole supply for the week ahead and am really looking forward to eating them all. A while back, before I was diagnosed with stomach ulcers, I was having strange reactions to eating oranges. Sometimes it felt like they were too acidic for me and I had trouble eating them on an empty stomach, so I was worried I might have the same reaction with these oranges, but none of that has happened thankfully! They are more sweet than anything else and taste great. I also purchased bananas yesterday, finally, after weeks of avoiding them! I had one today and I had no negative reactions to it, so I hope it will stay that way. Bananas are packed with nutrients and are so good for the body, and I want to keep them as part of my daily routine. Did I mention that they also contain Thiocyanate, which is what my body is deficient in and causes my disease? Yet another great reason to love them!

Update of the Week!

The meal planning worked in theory, but I have not actually been following it very closely. This week my body has been in crisis mode, meaning that there were two days when my body wanted to be in a severe crisis, but because of my diet, the pain was very manageable. Here is what I wrote from those days as memos on my phone, they're both from Monday:

7:39 a.m. 

I think I pushed myself a bit too much last week. I mentioned I wasn't feeling top notch a few days ago, and Sunday night into Monday morning my body was in full on crisis mode. I say crisis mode because I had the symptoms of having one - tired, pain in my right leg and various other parts of my body, ribs included, but it wasn't intense or even unmanageable pain. To remedy this, I went to bed early and took 2 sleep aid 500 mg acetaminophen when I felt the pain starting in my leg. As I was waiting for sleep to come, I felt the pain in my ribs and took a Codoliprane. Thankfully I was able to sleep alright and the pain was incredibly manageable. Over the next few days, I will rest and take it easy as much as I can and hopefully it won't turn into anything worse. Sticking to my routine is key, and I haven't stopped taking my Folic Acid, Liquid Chlorophyll, or Serrapeptase, and I continue to eat foods high in Thiocyanate.

3:04 p.m.

It's pretty ironic that my body's begun waging war on me only a few days after I decided to go public with my blog and let people know how my new diet is helping me. I wonder what the cause of the sickness is. Could it be the sea salt laxative I took on Thursday? Perhaps I added too much salt and my body ended up absorbing it rather than having the laxative go straight through me? Or could it be that since I'm eating more spinach now it's making my blood thicker? I'm more inclined to think it's got something to do with the laxative. In any case, it reminds me of the way I was sick the first day I began teaching, with all the horrible back pain I was going through which ended up keeping me out of work. Tomorrow I am starting yet another job, and now I'm worried about the way my body will respond. I'm hoping for the best and yet I fear for the worst. No matter what, I need to stick to my diet. Maybe an extra spoonful of Chlorophyll with my dinner will help me feel better.

So that's what happened on Monday, but it passed and I was feeling better the next day. On Thursday morning when I woke up, I had pain around my left elbow, but it was more like a soreness so I didn't pay much attention to it till later, when rubbing hadn't helped it. I took a few painkillers for it, but thankfully the pain was again, incredibly manageable and did not increase. Since Monday, I decided that I would take 2 tablespoons of Liquid Chlorophyll daily, once in the morning, and once in the evening. My elbow hurt all day on Thursday, but the pain was quite manageable, though it did augment a bit because the day was long for me, as I worked from 12:45-6pm, and had some stressful classes to deal with. On Friday I was feeling almost entirely better with my elbow, and it only started to hurt a bit again when I was at work, babysitting. I quickly rubbed it down with anti-inflammatory gel Voltaren that I purchased here, and took a Doliprane (1000mg of paracetamol) for it. It didn't hurt again after that.

This week's troubles have led me to start taking Liquid Chlorophyll twice a day, which I think is more helpful to my body than taking it once a day. Right now I feel great (besides having my stupid period!) and that is a good sign. I decided to stay home and take it easy today because I had a tiring week and I don't want to forget to rest. I haven't really kept up with my meal planning, and am wondering if I shouldn't go back to writing down my meals again to keep track of what I am eating and to make sure it's all healthy and beneficial.

Repost from a comment on the Sickle Cell Natural Healings Blog. Informative!

Click the highlighted text to see the original post and comment! It takes a bit of scrolling down the page.

In the 1970’s when Linus Pauling discovered the molecular basis of the sickle cell anemia, he contended it was a nutrient-deficiency disease. Houston and others have followed in his steps with numerous valid arguments, including clinical reports from the 1930’s and 1940s of the benefits of thiocianate in sickle cell blood. In his seminal article in which he lays out the evidence, both epidemiological and biochemical, Houston reviews the literature describing how Jamaicans who have immigrated to the United States have developed sickle cell anemia, a genetic ‘disease’ of which they had not even been aware. When some of these Jamaican natives returned to their island (and to their native diets) the sickle cell anemia crises subsided completely. Foods containing thiocyanate compounds are vegetables from the brassica family such as cabbage and broccoli, the seeds of most fruits, flax seeds, bitter almonds, the grain millet, and some pulses (beans). Africans have food preparation customs which lower the cyanate content of their staples, the cassava and African yam (no relation with potato), to safe levels. 



Although currently it is studied as a anti-cancer micronutrient, thiocyanate suffered a bad rap due to the fact that, on its metabolic path in the body, it turns into cyanide. However, pure cyanide, a molecule of carbon and one of nitrogen united by a triple bond, has existed long before any life form existed on Earth. Human body, and other vertebrates as well, can handle minute amounts of this highly poisonous substance. In fact cyanide has a role in the synthesis of vitamin B12. After making use of it, the body turns the cyanide back into thiocyanate with the help of the enzyme rhodanide synthetase. Sufficient protein intake is needed for this conversion to take place. Additonally, individuals who eat thiocyanate-rich foods have to supplement with iodine. 


There are dozens of plants containing thiocyanate or various compounds of cyanide, and one pioneer in revealing their health-giving properties, Ernst T. Krebs, has called them nitrilosides. Krebs, who contended that thiocyanate should be accepted as a vitamin (B17), researched animal diets as a student of zoology and found that most animals, including those living at the North Pole, have a thiocyanate source in the diet. 



Sickle cell patients were found to be clinical deficient in many micronutrients, including the amino acid Arginine, the minerals zinc, magnesium and the B vitamins. Some studies show that these and other nutrients such as fish oil, and a combination of folic acid, aged garlic, l-Arginine, vitamins E and C have had beneficial effects on the health of these patients. The mineral zinc, for example, was found to reduce leg ulcers, which are often associated with sickle cell anemia, while the mineral magnesium pidolate was found to reduce the crises.

To Be Honest, I've Been Neglecting My Fruits

Yes, it's true, I've been neglecting to eat my fruits recently, but I have good excuses for that. I previously mentioned that I was getting a bit nauseous when I would eat bananas. They would also make my stomach hurt a bit at times when I would eat them on an empty stomach in the morning, and I'm pretty sure that is because of my ulcers. Eating apples had me feeling incredibly, and sometimes uncomfortably, full, and I didn't feel so great after eating them on an empty stomach. As for oranges, the citrus-y fruit didn't seem to be agreeing with me at times. I used to bring a banana or an apple along with me when I was going out so that I could have it as a snack later. But then, I gradually gave up on those natural fruits, and have been choosing cereal bars as my snack food of choice. Today, I have finally realized the error of my ways. Though my body shows me those noticeable effects after I eat those fruits, I know that my body will get rock solid benefits from those all natural, nutrient packed foods. I don't feel any sort of effect after eating cereal bars, and yet, they aren't packed with the nutrients I need. Cereal bars are packed with sugar and highly-processed nonsense that I don't need in my system. I would rather deal with a bit of discomfort from food that I know will be beneficial to me, than to put nonbeneficial nonsensical foods into my system. I'll be buying my fruits at my local market tomorrow and here's to wishing me a healthier snack food filled health journey.

There's Hope!

There have been times in dealing with this disease where I have felt so hopeless and have just wondered if it was worth it to continue on. My most recent crisis, which happened in November, had me wondering if I shouldn't swallow several Codeine and end it all, and that was at my worst. At my best I was thinking that my best solution would be to go back home. At least, if I was going to be feeling horrible, I might as well be home where I could be with my family and friends. I had started by diet back in June, but had given up in late July/early August because my body still wasn't feeling miraculously renewed like I wanted it to. I wasn't patient enough with it or with my body. Starting on a new health journey, or any new journey in life takes time. It takes time and patience to work with your body (or in your life) to see what needs to be changed, what works, and what doesn't. It also takes careful observation. It's about dedication to yourself, it's about loving yourself, and making a decision to stick to something new that will benefit you. For those of you out there who have been where I've been, or who've been even worse off, I want you to know that there is hope for you. Things CAN get better! If you need someone to talk to, I can lend an ear, and I can tell you what has worked for me and what hasn't. Just please, don't lose hope!

Be Careful with Painkillers!

One of the sad things that I've experienced as a result of having this disease is the abuse of painkillers. From the time I was in high school to about a year ago, I popped pills like they were candy. Whenever I felt some aches and pains coming on, I hopped right on them with a painkiller. I didn't know how else to manage the pain, and I was doing what the doctors had told me, which was to drink water and take painkillers whenever necessary. Living with this disease has been incredibly difficult, and there were times when I would take some painkillers and drink my water and just go to bed, hoping and wishing that I wouldn't wake up and have to deal with any more pain. Mind you, the pain wasn't always severe. It was just the constancy of it that was wearing me out. I knew that taking many painkillers would damage my body, but I didn't really have much of an alternative. That's one of the most difficult things about this disease. One cannot function with the pain, and yet the painkillers are slowly wreaking havoc upon one's body. And Sickle Cell pain isn't normal pain. It's the kind of pain that can start as a little pinprick and explode into the kind of pain that lands you screaming in the hospital because the painkillers they're giving you simply aren't strong enough.

The best thing about these natural remedies is that they help the body to produce blood cells normally and help the body to make up for what it lacks, especially the Thiocyanate. What I've experienced with various painkillers is this: When I take Tylenol or Acetaminophen, I notice that I have trouble breathing afterward. I have asthma as well as SC, and though my asthma is mild, the Tylenol and Acetaminophen that I used to take in great amounts have grown to aggravate my respiratory system. I developped ulcers as a result of years of taking Ibuprofen (anti-inflammatory) and Aspirin (blood thinner). I knew that I was doing damage to my body when I was taking them, but it was between choosing to live with untreated pain that was driving me to suicide's door, or taking the damaging painkillers to help make life more manageable. I was taking such doses that people who are more sensitive to painkillers would be a bit worried when they noticed what I was taking, but it couldn't be helped. Until now. Now I take painkillers much less frequently, and I hope that my body has become more sensitive to normal doses of painkillers (though I'm not very certain about that.) I am determined to stick to this diet and to this natural way of treating my disease, and I hope that this blog can be an encouragement to others who are dealing with it.

Is My Body Too Alkaline?

I was reading the Sickle Cell - Natural Healings Blog, and I saw something listed on the side about Chlorophyll:

Chlorophyll Benefits

*Builds red blood cells
*Delivers magnesium which makes our bodies more alkaline
*Improves oxygen throughout our body
*Builds hemoglobin
*Cleanse the liver
*Prevents the growth of bacteria

I began to wonder then if my body is not too alkaline. I habitually put Apple Cider Vinegar in my water, and I began doing that to help me with digestion. Due to my ulcers, I was getting a bloated stomach after eating, and it was very uncomfortable for me. Something I heard from my health teacher in the Spring semester of 2012 and research that I did online led me to find that ACV is good for helping with digestion. Among other things! ACV is also good for helping heal warts and other fungi on the skin, and drinking 2-3 tablespoons of it in a glass of water everyday helps to keep the body alkaline, which makes it a hostile environment for the common cold. However, too much of a good thing is a bad thing! The Liquid Chlorophyll is making my body alkaline as well as the ACV, and perhaps that is why my body has been feeling a bit not so great yesterday and today. My main problem with ACV is that I like the taste of it, and thinking of the benefits, I just usually add a bit to my water every time I have a glass.  I have also noticed that when I add ACV to my water, it stays in my body longer and I don't have to run to the bathroom every 45 minutes. (I drink a LOT of water everyday to keep myself nice and hydrated and I have to run to the bathroom very often!!!) But I shall cut back and see what happens. I'm sure I will still experience the benefits of it being as how I will still drink a bit in the morning, or probably after I have a heavy meal, and the LC will also be helping make my body more alkaline.

Meal Planning for a Better Diet

I was feeling a bit run down earlier today, with a bit of pain in my right knee, a bit around my left elbow, and a bit of soreness/pain in the muscles near my groin. There are too many stairs in the Paris metro system and not enough escalators or elevators, and I think that having to deal with all those stairs is part of what caused me to be feeling run down. I think that I also haven't been getting enough Thiocyanate in my diet, which is absolutely unacceptable!  A bit earlier I had the idea to start planning my meals, that way they are thought out sooner rather than later, and even if I don't follow them to a "T" (which I didn't tonight as I didn't have enough room in my tummy for beets as well as the spinach with lentils and plantain I'd prepared), I'll still have a general idea of what to follow. It would also allow me to be a bit more creative with my meals. Who wants to eat boring food? Most certainly not me! That's part of why I came off my diet in July, because I was getting bored with the dishes I'd been preparing. But there are plenty of different ways to cook the same foods and come out with different, more interesting dishes!

Serrapeptase Effects?

I haven’t noticed any changes since I've started taking the Serrapeptase, but it's only been about 3 days, so I suppose I should patient. The thing with remedies is that I want them to act right away so that I can start feeling great with no delay, but that's just a false American mindset perpetrated by the media. These things do take time to go into effect, and I need to be patient with the way they work. The body runs in cycles, and my body must be getting used to the Serrapeptase as it quietly does its work. The good thing is that I don't feel any ill effects, so that's already a positive sign. I think that later today or tomorrow I will buy some bananas and start eating them regularly again, and hopefully there will be no nausea when I eat them. Bananas are packed with great nutrients for the body, and can help someone feel more relaxed if they're feeling stressed, increase Serotonin in the brain, and a banana or two a day can also help lower blood pressure! But don't take my word for it, Google it to find out the many wonders bananas contain!

October 4

It would seem that some of the side effects of the meds I took on Monday are having to pee more frequently (though perhaps that’s just because I’m drinking more water??), my ulcers are aggravated and act up especially when I eat bananas, and I have diarrhea, which I attribute to the Codeine.

Hindsight Observations

October 2

         I reread a bit of my journal, and in rereading and connecting the general observations about my health, my suspicions about my body running in cycles when it comes to the pain have been confirmed. At the end of August my body was feeling down and hurty and at the end of September/beginning of October, my body has been hurting like crazy. The event that links them is my period. My body is always somewhat down when I have it, I get pain around my knees and my lower body is not as willing to support me. Last month I had hip and knee pain when my period was coming to an end. This time it was/is back pain and arm pain and general joints. Yesterday was crazy, I think I had to take about 4 Codeine, 2  NurofenFlash, which I bought here, and 3 Sleeping Acetaminophen to get me through the day/night, as well as the Mineral Ice gel. Thankfully they all helped and I was able to get through my first day of teaching alright.

         Now that I know what to keep an eye out for, at the end of this month when my period comes I will add more Iron and Thiocyanate filled foods to my diet so I can build up my blood strength. I think I will also begin keeping a food journal once more, or up least update it in terms of my health so I can understand the patterns that my body is cycling through. I also had excessive food cravings and was overly cold last week, which is probably another sign pointing to me being sick yesterday and today. So for my next period, I will be sure to add more Iron and Thiocyanate rich foods to my diet so that my body can feel better.

         Let it also be noted that I gave up on the Food Journal and the diet because I didn’t feel like my efforts were amounting to much (as well as the pressure from my parents who felt offended that I wasn’t eating their food). But now that I understand a bit better what my body is doing, I will start eating more of the foods on the list and maybe I’ll record them to have an idea of what works best and what doesn’t.

Breakfast

Banana

Scrambled Eggs with Ham and Onions

Plantain

Apple

July 29

Feeling fine. Eating my Thiocyanate containing foods and drinking lots of water like I should.

Day? 26 July

Not feeling well tonight. Wondering if it’s because I tried to work out two days ago or because of stress or just because life sucks sometimes. Wondering what I’m gonna do in France if I can’t handle job stress or my health. This all points to suckiness and things that don’t bode well. My ribs hurt and so does the muscle in my right leg. How am I supposed to live if my body thwarts me every time I try to live? Is it worth it to go to France? How will I do for seven months if I keep getting sick despite the fact that I’m eating pretty healthy? I honestly don’t know what to do. I have a good job, for the most part, right now. I could keep it, and not stress about it. If I go overseas for seven months, how will I fare mentally and emotionally?

Day ? – 23 July

Last week was terrible so I didn’t really keep up with this, but I’ve still been eating as healthy as possible. The stomach pains lasted for half the week, landing me in the ER Tuesday early morning. Today it’s almost completely gone.

Breakfast

Banana

Curried Barley Pilaf w. Raisins and Almonds

Curried Lentils

Strawberry Cake

Snack

Wise Corn Chips

Later Snack

Banana

Lunch/Dinner

Curried Barley Pilaf w. Raisins and Almonds

Later Snack

Banana

Even Later

Two Bags Wise Corn Chips

Later

Chamomile Tea

Even Later

Strawberry Cake

Day 20 – 16 July

Breakfast

Banana

Lunch

Rice and Beans

Curried Lentils

Steamed Carrots w. Watercress

The pain’s mostly gone today, the memories of it remain in my muscles. Diarrhea this morning.